Decomposing with Dignity

I spoke to the green gull

That forth cometh through the window like road kill,

The strange bowler hat with deep fried pickle grease inside.

The queen of the sea devours sailors;

They go off into a mad teacup

Of distilled essence of the life that never ended in

a spaghettifying mummified cat carcass buried in the walls of your pelvis.

The golden wings of the princes sick of transforming straw:

The great crow squawks,

Squabbles, squirts, and scopes indetermined mind over matter,

Disintegrates into a drop of mercury sliding down your throat.

 

A collective, blind poem by Jason Abdelhadi, Lake, Patrick Provonost, and Vittoria Lion, played on March 18 2018. Written in turns, only the last word of each line was revealed to the next player. 

Advertisements

Utopian Extremophilia

In this game, a utopian condition is given, which the players must then develop to its most extreme, often dystopian limit.

bombi

“Lovable stuffed animals come to life.”

Children assisted by stuff animals murder all adults. Dolls turn children into dolls when they reach a certain age to ensure they do not grow into adults. Immortal dolls and toys forever. In the end, nobody to play with. A stuffed doll unable which is unable to be the object of play.

“All keys can open everything.”

Curious people would open doors into the future, solve all the problems but gain too much knowledge of super-being celestial terrors and go mad in a Lovecraftian fashion. Everyone has to deal with people walking into every house. All passwords would work on all accounts and everything would be accessible. Any piano key could play any song. Any key on a phone can be used to call anyone, even the President. Implosion of all privacy, complete transparency of institutions.

“Everyone is physically comfortable and healthy all of the time regardless of what they do to themselves.”

No illness, nobody needs to bathe or be hygienic or eat, all mental distinctions and character traits derived from physical incapacities and traumas would be wiped out. The value of labour would be driven down by all the free time and the length of life. People would be unable to fake sick days  or malinger, no pretense of unwellness, no leisure – no internal life, no creativity, people can be punished for their actual choices and not hide behind health issues. No exercise, no gains, physical culture would die, people would turn into Greek statues. Perhpaps this is the origin of classical sculpture.

Recent Patents

Our research  and development team has recently been taking out patents on some intellectual property. However, due to an unfortunate personal enmity the team members refused to speak to each other during the design and marketing processes. While one designed an object, cursing under their breath, the other worked independently on the concept, title and marketing at the other end of the room…

The Epigenetic Horseshoe (sold in BULK as GeneClaws™)

 

image2

The Surgical-Ironing Simple-Scope (miniature edition for her)

image4

 

Dr. Zhen’s Remedial Sculpture and Included Housefly-Warding Shock Wand

image1

The Ecstatic Introversion Eroder for Undulating Introverted Eels

image3

The Assault Frame Anterior Penile Plethysmographer with Built-In Castration Whisks

IMG_7232